Holidays and Family Time..

Hmm.. I was in two minds about writing this post then thought what the hell, I may as well place my thoughts on paper,

So, we all know that holidays generally come with family time, be it leading up to Christmas or New Years Celebrations, which this year, hubbs and I decided to do Christmas with my family, then do our own short holiday then New Years with his side of the family,

Family family family..sigh..

I feel family often forgets that no matter how brave we come across, smile, are helpful and generally all giving, we are still human.. so we all know that I've battled with my weight a few years now and still working at it, but somehow, its the most normal thing to go on about it for days.. at every sight its some unwelcome comment of how your body is imperfect.. the story is never ending..

The long and short is, there was a breaking that happened in me last night, I've had a hard year.. I've worked so hard.. some things came through, some didn't.. I'd decided to be here - just to have all kinds of insensitivities be the daily talk.. as I sobbed on his shoulder I remembered that from a very young age, I was always imperfect according to all.. never the best.. not the best girl, not the prettiest not anything, but many years later I found myself.. and found the happiest place that no one could tread in as their views of me had nothing to do with me.. After I'd released the hurt of those words, I saw the light.. a light that reminded me of everything I am.. that has nothing to do with anyone else.. 

And handstands.. love**!

 I'm the most beautiful version of self I know, coming to terms with the battle with my weight hasn't stopped me from constantly trying (nor living my best life quite frankly :) ), but no one gets to judge me by their standards of beauty, not my family, not anyone.. 

And thats how I entered Christmas, if I wasn't on a diet oath I'd eat everything just to drive the point of my disinterest home but alas, I choose me..

Sorry for the damper post but hey..

Ps, wishing everyone a blessed time with family through this festive season, may it bring joy and fulfilment and a more resilient you as you prepare for the new year, lots of love!



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