A Girl and the Journey

Hello beautifuls, 

I hope your Christmas was so special, celebrated in the best way known to express and receive the love around you.

I woke this morning wanting to share a bit, the year has been a mixture of the most incredible moments for me, but also some very difficult spaces, probably because the whole world has often told me I'm too straight forward and should work on finding kinder words to communicate what I need to say, this has frustrated me quite a bit, but in the frustration also censored me quite a bit - so instead of saying what I needed to say in multiple spaces, because of the admin and the lack of commitment of going around to go straight, I would rather then say nothing. This saying nothing brought me to a place of near break down.



Ive always been strong for all those around me, holding all things imaginable and unimaginable, being support as I best can, but I've also never been one to show my emotions, I deal with my own stuff.... so in the carrying of the world, when Zandi needed a pillar, the cracks started showing, badly, and I knew I needed to see my grandmother before I quit on everything - that intense.

So I stop and share the space that my Gogo is, arriving here was peace, a resting place for never ending expectations, a resting place for the mind, a place where I can just be a girl besotted with her gran, and actually feel the pleasant tingles that come with idle moments as my sister and I have drinks on the stoep. The simplicity that I often crave.

So, I share my healings from my time here,

1. My sister was upset with her a daughter, discipline and lots of crying, 10 minutes later, she was back at her mom, having apologised and wanting to show her the next awesome thing that had happened at Gogo - be a child always, let nothing linger past the moment where an apology was given and forgiveness was granted.
2. Every so often, put the head basket down that fills with mass expectations, dreams, hopes, anxiety, work and just be in the space, allow the love around you to fill you,  and heal you.
3. Tell Gogo everything, she's always in a place to give a little bit more wisdom, with a little less caution than the world.
4. Let the little ones around you heal you, I've always loved my sense of wonder almost like I was still 5 years old... I love the awe and look in their eyes, it cleanses my soul.


I hope in any moments of difficulty you find the courage to hold strong, just for a little bit more, till you get to your safe place, where you can put the baggage down and rest, acknowledge this place of rest and let her heal you, she most certainly always will

And pray, in whichever way you know, do it. The universe is tasked to aid you in every single way, it exists for you.

Mass love,

Xx

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